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Ep 93: How to Trust Your Desires

WHAT YOU'LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

  • How to identify your desires
  • How to trust your desires 
  • How to feel and enjoy your desire without needing to achieve or have it

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This week we're diving into our desires.

- Identifying them
- Trusting them
- Savoring the yumminess of just wanting something and being okay if we don't actualize it

Would you believe me if I told you desires are medicine for your heart, your soul, your brain, your life?

Probably not, right?

But they ARE.

Society has conditioned us to suppress our desires. To keep them secret.

This rids us of the medicine desires can bring us. The illumination and guiding force they can have on what we REALLY want in life.

This episode will help you identify your desires and understand how to savor the feeling without needing to get or have everything you want.

If this episode inspired you, thank you for leaving a review on Apple Podcasts.

You can also comment on this podcast's Instagram post or take a screenshot of you listening and post it to your Instagram stories, LinkedIn, or Twitter.
Tag me @sarahlmoody

You got this, rockstar.

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Download Full Episode Transcript

Sarah moody: Okay, rockstars, let's dive into desire. This week we're going to talk about how to identify and enjoy your desires. So, first of all, what a desire? Desire is an emotion or a feeling I think of it as fuel. And it's caused by your thoughts in your brain. So desire is a feeling in your body. It's a set of sensations in your body that's caused by your thoughts.

I think your desires, like a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen in your life. It's like, you know, Desire is like owning the wanting it's to say, I want there's an I in it. I feel deserving or want it. I'm giving myself the permission to want it.

And so many of us women, don't understand, don't feel worthy, think desires are too much, don't even understand what desire is. Like when I started, before I hired my coach, I didn't know what desires meant. I didn't allow myself to have desires. I didn't identify anything.

I desired. I thought that like, I didn't feel worthy of having desires. So, this podcast is also going to talk about how do I identify and enjoy your desires. It's about being a person who has desires. It's it's about your being right. A person who allows themselves to have desires. It's about being a person who achieves their desires or not.

You know, both scenarios are actually safe and satisfying and I'll go into that in the podcast. So desire is a fundamental expression of you and who you are, but most of us just don't even allow ourselves to even go there. And when we do allow ourselves to go there and identify our desire, we think of it as something that we immediately want to satisfy.

So we feel desire. We feel wanting and it feels good. Right? And so the first thing I want you to think about though, is like what, now that you've talked about, like, what is desire and desire's an emotion, or like a feeling or fuel. Now I want you to think about like, what do you desire? And I want you to identify your desires just because you want them, like no other reason you desire a solo weekend away with friends.

You desire a solo week. I mean, a solo weekend away from the family to be with friends. You desire a solo weekend. You desire some hot new clothes to feel amazing in you, desire you, you want to feel desire for your current romantic partner. You desire dining at that hot new restaurant in town. So I want you to think about what you desire, identify your desires.

And I want you to think about your desires just because you want them. No other reason. So many of us as women are conditioned to believe that we need to explain ourselves, so no need to justify or explain any of your desires. Just start thinking about some desires and notice that your brain might come up with thoughts

like: I don't even know what I desire or I'm not worthy of desires or desires feel greedy. Like I have enough. So notice any of those resisting thoughts. I want you to trust yourself that what you desire is medicine for your heart, your soul, your brain, and your life. Now, I'm going to repeat this trust that what you desire is medicine for your heart, your soul, your brain, and your life.

When you think that way, this whole concept of identifying, enjoying your desires will shift. So I want you to think about what are you drawn to? Like what makes your body relax? What is like an F yes, I want that. Use these questions to think about desire. And I bet for many of you, your desires are secrets that are locked up inside of you.

That you're totally afraid to admit to yourself. And they're definitely not going to see the light of day or be whispered into the ears of others. Right. And why is that? Why do we do that? Because if we desire something, but our brain says, there's no way you can have that. Or there's no way you can do that.

We believe our logical brain. So if our current beliefs in our being don't match what we desire, we turn off the feeling of desire, which means we're not going to grow. And means we're not going to go find a medicine for our heart, soul, brain, and life. Right. So just know that that's why you might notice some resistance.

You might desire something, but your brain might just say, there's no way, and you're going to turn it off. So embrace the resistance, know that it's just your brain doing what it does, keeping you safe. And still tap into trusting yourself that what you desire is really effing good for you. Okay. So the next thing that I want you to think about is, so that's like, how do I identify desire?

The next thing is, I want you to practice enjoying your desires, Ealing and enjoying your desires without achieving the desire. Okay. So when we achieve what we desire, like a new car, we're going to get a dopamine hit, right? When we've achieved that desire. If we can practice feeling desire and our body without achieving quote, the thing.

We will feel the yumminess of desire and our lives today without having to achieve quote, the thing. You're going to learn, how wanting something can be pleasurable in the moment you want it, whether or not it ever gets satisfied. So what if you could just experiencing, wanting, or desire as pleasurable in and of itself, regardless of whether it gets satisfied.

Like, what if you could learn just to enjoy the wanting, like, for me, I would love to have a romantic partner in my life. I'm just in, so right now I'm just enjoying that, wanting that desire. Right. I don't have it. I'm just enjoying the desire. So if you could learn to enjoy the wanting, not just the, having this would change everything for you for two weeks.

First, you can start appreciating that, wanting and desiring our feelings that we only get to experience before we have something. Right. And so the wanting and the desiring is what makes it so satisfying to get it. And so it's like the 50, 50 of life, right? Think of like hunger and fullness or love and loss.

It's the absence of a desire for something that makes it satisfying to get. So for example, think about when you're hungry, food tastes flipping amazing. Right. And when you're satisfied or not hungry food, actually doesn't taste that great. Right? So practicing, appreciating, and just feeling desire without achieving, whatever it is that you want to desire is really going to help you slow down, stay in the moment, rock this feeling, the yumminess of denier and wanting, and just enjoy being in the moment.

Okay. So for the next 30 days, actually for the next seven days, put a little notice in your calendar, identify one thing you desire. It could be to take a nap that afternoon or buy that hot out that you saw online, or ask your boss for a raise. Or plan that super fund we can get. Take Friday off from work, decide all the next week that you're just not going to work after five o'clock.

Buy a new car,

Put a new one thing you desire, write it down every day for the next seven days. Don't repeat either. Okay. And notice your brain's resistance. Like I'm not worthy. There's no way. I'm too big for my breeches. I have enough. Notice all those resisting thoughts and just love your brain through it. And definitely DM me on Instagram or send me a note on LinkedIn.

I would love to know what you all are desiring or even just, you know, send me a video with what your desiring. All right. I don't want you to overthink your desires either. Okay. Trust that what comes to mind when you do this exercise over the next seven days before I talk to you next week is exactly the medicine that you need in your life right now.

Trust that what you desire is medicine. It's healing. It's calming. It's perfect. Okay. Have a beautiful rest of your day. I love you. And I will talk to you next week.


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